Ah, taxes—the one villain even Gotham’s finest can’t seem to avoid. Listen up, citizen: even I, Batman, must file my returns. Here are some sarcastically heroic tips to keep your fiscal Batcave secure:

1. Keep Every Receipt
Just as I never lose track of clues in Gotham’s darkest alleys, you should hold onto every receipt. If you can’t prove your expenses, the IRS might as well be the Joker—constantly lurking, waiting to pounce.

2. Itemize Deductions
Don’t just take the standard deduction and call it a night. If you’ve got legitimate expenses, like work-related travel or that high-tech gadgetry you need to survive your daily battles, itemize them. Think of it as upgrading your tax armor.

3. Max Out Retirement Contributions
Even the Dark Knight needs a plan for when he hangs up the cape. Investing in your retirement isn’t just smart—it’s necessary. After all, who wants to face the future with nothing but a utility belt of regret?

4. Consult a Professional
The tax code is more twisted than any plot by the Riddler. If you’re not sure what deductions apply to your situation, get a professional on your side. Trust me, it’s far better than facing an audit alone, much like battling Gotham’s criminals without a plan.

Remember, filing taxes might be about as enjoyable as a night in Arkham Asylum, but with a little diligence and the right strategies, you can save yourself from financial peril. Now, go forth and conquer tax season—before it conquers you.