Look, I don’t like hospitals. I don’t like taxes. And I sure as hell don’t like it when I can’t deduct something that feels like it should be deductible.

Batgirl got hurt. Big surprise. We’re crimefighters, not accountants. She’s out there every night, taking down thugs, and then—BAM—some idiot with a crowbar puts her in the hospital. And hospitals aren’t cheap. Even the good ones (the ones that don’t ask a lot of questions about “mysterious vigilante injuries”) will slap you with a bill so high, you’d think they were the real villains.

So, being the responsible (and, let’s be honest, rich) guy I am, I tossed some money into a GoFundMe that Nightwing set up. Not because I had to, but because it’s the right thing to do. Gotham takes care of its own. But then, being the savvy billionaire that I am, I asked Alfred, “Can I write this off on my taxes?”

And guess what? NO.

Why? Because the IRS is worse than the Joker.

The Harsh Reality of Tax Deductions

To deduct a charitable contribution, it has to go to a qualified 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization. That means a charity that the IRS has officially blessed as tax-deductible. GoFundMe campaigns? Not so much. Even if the money is going to a good cause—like Batgirl’s medical bills—it’s still considered a personal gift. And personal gifts are not tax-deductible.

You know what is tax-deductible? Donations to Wayne Foundation for Crime Victim Support. That money is helping people, and that money gets me a nice, clean deduction. But direct payments to a GoFundMe for Batgirl? Nope. Not unless Nightwing somehow registered it as a nonprofit (which, let’s be honest, he didn’t, because he’s too busy flipping off rooftops).

The Infuriating Loophole

Here’s where it gets even worse. If I had given the money directly to a qualifying charity, and then that charity had paid Batgirl’s bills, I could have deducted it. But because I sent it through GoFundMe, it’s just a “gift.” That’s the difference between Batman getting a tax break and Batman just losing money into the void.

So What’s the Solution?

If you’re ever in a situation where you want to help a friend (or fellow crimefighter) with their expenses and get a tax deduction, do it through a registered charity. Set up a charitable fund in their name. Get a nonprofit involved. Or—better yet—just donate to a charity that supports people like them, so at least your money is going to a similar cause.

In the meantime, I’ll be over here, glaring at my accountant and wondering if I can somehow deduct batarangs as a business expense.